The Goddamned Writers' Strike

If you've read this blog more than once, you know I watch a lot of TV. Needless to say, I'm a little pissed about this Writers' Strike, now entering its second month.

The strike came at a time when most TV shows were about halfway through their production schedules, meaning most shows had around 10-15 episodes in the can before their writers walked out. Others, like Lost and 24, which started production later due to their January premiere dates, have even fewer and may not even come out on time. At least one show that I can think of (Heroes: Origins) has been shitcanned altogether. And as we're already about 10 weeks into the new TV season, every show is going into reruns to preserve their remaining new episodes, regardless of whether they had a hiatus scheduled or not. It's a really great deal for the TV viewer.

I'm going to change gears here for a moment. I've worked in the auto industry for a number of years, and have had to deal with the United Auto Workers for every one of them. The UAW is a huge union, with over half a million active members. (The two Writers Guilds have about 12,000.) Their union contract with the auto manufacturers is the size of the Greater Los Angeles white pages. Every and anything the union can get from the car makers they will take. And, over the years, they've taken a lot.

In September and October, the UAW struck two of the Big Three American car companies, after negotiations on their new contracts broke down. The major sticking points in the negotiations were healthcare and the establishment of a company-funded, union-run retiree pension fund. These were both huge points for the auto makers, as legacy costs have nearly driven the Big Three (especially GM) to the brink of bankruptcy. Now, I can see why you would strike over these points, as healthcare is an extremely important (and expensive) issue for companies and employees alike.

The two strikes lasted three days each. The UAW agreed to pay for some of their health care, agreed to the new pension deal, took a one-time bonus in lieu of yearly wage increases, agreed to the establishment of a two-tier wage scale, and took the auto makers' word on increased production in the US. It doesn't seem like the UAW got a whole lot out of the deal, but, trust me: They got exactly what they wanted.

That being said, the UAW looks like a poverty-stricken monastic order compared to the Writers Guilds. Basically, the point of contention in their negotiations is that they want a cut of everything that can make money. Advertising revenue from internet broadcasts, royalties from DVD sales, even profits from reality programming, which doesn't even have writers (except for The Hills, which is about as spontaneous as a glacier). They even want any possible revenue from internet-only content, which makes no money. In short, if there's money involved, they want a cut.

I read that the average Guild member makes $60,000 a year. Hardly slave wages. And they want every possible royalty on top of that. Most unionized employees would be ecstatic to make that much. Yet I don't see them clamoring for royalties. Can you imagine if the UAW demanded that they be paid a percentage of every vehicle sold? Or if garbage men asked for a bonus based on the amount of trash collected? Their respective employers would laugh in their faces and fire the whole fucking lot and start from scratch. And those are jobs that make the world go 'round, so to speak.

But, apparently it's ok for a bunch of dingleberries who write TV shows to expect to be compensated thusly, and still expect to keep their jobs. I do appreciate the fact that the networks are retaliating by firing the non-writing staffs of their shows: no money coming in, no need for money to go out. Gotta save up the money that these asshole writers are going to end up making while you can.

So, until the strike comes to a close, enjoy the reruns and endless hours of reality programming the networks will be showing in lieu of original programming. I know you'll enjoy it as much as I will.