Handicapping The Oscars

So, the Oscar noms are tomorrow, and because I like doing things like this, of course I'll be picking winners. But, unfortunately, from what I've seen in theatres this years, the Oscars will probably be canceled, as I haven't seen a really decent movie this year (at least not Oscar-worthy).

So, what will get nominated? There'll be nominations for The Aviator, Million Dollar Baby, Ray. I'm sure Jamie Foxx will get at least one nom, as will Leonardo D, probably Tom Hanks. The great Chinese film Hero will probably be up for Best Forei...oh, wait, it was already nominated for that, TWO FUCKING YEARS AGO. (Way to get those foreign movies to this country in a timely fashion, Miramax.) The one I don't know about is Sideways. Critics are hailing this as the best movie ever, yet I don't believe any non-critic has actually seen it. Since Oscar voters are notorious for not knowing anything about movies, except the "For Your Consideration" screeners that studios send them, we'll see if anyone actually knows this movie exists.

But, this is all speculation. Check back tomorrow, and I'll pick some winners out of a whole shitload of movies I haven't seen. AWESOME!