Friday, July 11, 2008

I Don't Know Why I Bother Anymore

I enjoy going to the movies. I enjoy it so much and do it so often that I actually refer to it as a hobby rather than a way to pass the time.

Summer is the time to see movies; this is when all the big movies come out. During a summer, I'll see a dozen or so movies. But, despite my love for watching movies, I'm beginning to wonder why I feel the need to see the piles of shit that the studios are passing off as movies these days. As of right now, I have seen everything in current release (with the exception of Sex and the City, Zohan, American Girl and Kung-Fu Panda), and I can safely say I'm quickly losing confidence in Hollywood's movie-making ability.

Take Hancock, for example. I've always thought the idea of the scumbag superhero was an entertaining one. Superman turning into a drunken lech was the only good part of Superman 3. So, why wouldn't a whole movie of that same thing be great? Because, once you get away from that idea, which this movie does at about the 45 minute mark...well, it's just shit. Rumor has it that the original cut of this movie was two and a half hours long; I wonder if they cut out all the good parts.

And then there's Wanted, the movie in which Angelina Jolie looks to weigh about 87 pounds (skeletons are sooo hot this year). Here we have some of the most mind-blowing action scenes ever filmed entangled with one of the most harebrained plots ever. Director Timur Bekmambetov's previous movies were less nonsensical, and they were all in Russian!

Then there's this weekend's new movie, Hellboy 2. As is the case with most of Guillermo del Toro's movies, he gives us things to look at that are absolutely beautiful and other-worldly, but, unlike his previous movies, he attaches them to a plot that a two-year old would consider simple-minded. (Maybe it's just me, but I'm noticing a pattern with the "beautiful visuals with no plot" theme in movies.)

In fact, the only thing in current release I would recommend anyone see is WALL-E, which I had no expectations for, and was presently surprised that it turned out to be the best movie I've seen all summer. (Yes, it's better than Indiana Jones.) Considering there's like a dozen or so movies in wide-release right now, that's a pretty bad average.

So, to commemorate "The Summer of Shit" (much like I did with last summer's "Summer of Sequels"), I've changed the poll to "Worst Summer Movie So Far." There's plenty to vote for, so don't be stingy.

And, hopefully, the season will turn around when The Dark Knight comes out next week. But I'm not holding my breath.

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