Best Buy Will Totally Anally Rape You

Seeing as I was about to upgrade to HD cable, and TiVo has an impending HD box coming out, I figured it was about time to upgrade to free up some of those component video inputs on my TV. So, I decided to buy an HD DVD player. Mind you, not a true HD DVD player, like the one Toshiba makes, as those players are insanely expensive, and there are two competing formats (Blu-Ray is the other) and I don't want to get stuck with Beta (if you know what I mean), but an "up-convert" model that plays conventional DVDs in HD. I did some on-line shopping, and found a Samsung DVD/VCR player that did what I wanted at Best Buy. (I found a Sony that was virtually the same as my current player, but, for some reason, Best Buy only offers that one on-line.) So, of I went to Best Buy.

The first thing I looked for was an HDMI cable, the wondrous audio/video connector that makes 1080p resolution possible. And Best Buy had plenty of them. Unfortunately, some of them cost as much as the player itself. Their cheapest one was $60. Nigga, please. (I later picked up an HDMI cable, a surge protector, and an S-video cable for $45 at Wal-Mart. Sixty bucks, my ass.)

The next problem I ran into was they didn't appear to have the model I wanted in stock. Oh sure, they have the demo model, but none in stock. Every other DVD player, they got. But not this one. I waited approximately six hours for someone to help me, and, finally, I was given the one I wanted. (I don't know what it is with Best Buy: If you're just browsing, they're all over you; if you're buying, it's like a fucking ghost town.)

So, I get it home, get everything hooked up, and...it only played discs distributed by Anchor Bay. Which is fine, if I only wanted to watch The Beyond or Army of Darkness, but not so good for everything else. (I will say that The Beyond looks absolutely great in 1080i; too bad it doesn't improve the quality of the actual movie any.) Needless to say, I was mildly pissed.

Back to Best Buy I went, where I exchanged it for another one, hoping that this was just a problem with that unit, and not every one of that model. When I got it home, this one worked. (Thank Christ.) And everything I played on it looked great. Everyone (and by "everyone," I mean "me") was happy.

If you're still rolling with the old analog equipment, you pretty much need to upgrade as soon as possible. And if you're cable isn't HD, you need to get that, too; you have no idea what you're missing. Just maybe avoid Best Buy, if possible.