Iron Man Officially Fucked

As a kid, Iron Man was my favorite superhero. Sure, he was just a guy in a metal suit with no powers, but, well, he had the coolest metal suit ever.

That being said, needless to say, I'm interested in any movie adaptation of Iron Man. And today, they announced some new casting info that makes me think that the movie version will really suck balls.

Apparently, Gwyneth Paltrow has signed on to play Tony Stark's (Iron Man's alter ego) secretary, "Pepper" Potts, which, well, it's Gwyneth Paltrow; need I say more?

But that's not the worst thing with this movie. No, it's not that they've got Jon Favreau directing, even though the only action movie he's directed is Jumanji 2. It would be the fact that Robert Downey, Jr., is playing Iron Man.

Robert Downey, Jr.

What...the...fuck. Downey's a great actor, but there's, well, approximately every actor in Hollywood I'd pick before him in this role. You thought George Clooney was miscast as Batman? He'd actually be a better pick for this role than Downey. (He's too "important" to star in action movies anymore, though.)

Although I seriously doubt it, maybe Iron Man will turn out to be all right. But I'm not holding my breath.